i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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