WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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