Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
