He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
