used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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