RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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