Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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