U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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