do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
