Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
