With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
