anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
