new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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