Dual....:-)
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
