so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
