We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
