i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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