and you said cock pushups were impossible
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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