He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
