ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
areolas are like halos for boobs.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
