what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize