normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
