Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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