She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize