If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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