i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize