it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize