Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
