Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
