and my herpes radar will keep us safe
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
i out mim tonsoeep
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
