she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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