I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she looked like the before picture.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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