we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
We need a shit load of segways right now
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize