Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
