Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
