my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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