Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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