Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
This baby is an asshole
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Randomize
