i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
