that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
