I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
