So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Randomize
