I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
