Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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