Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
