That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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