Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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