Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
is it fun? or sober?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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