so that wasnt chicken after all
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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