If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
we're so committed to being not committed
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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