it hurts more in the daytime
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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