wat bout pragnant strippers??
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
